Medical Gaslighting: How to Recognize It and What to Do About It

Has your doctor told you that your chronic symptoms are psychosomatic or “in your head”?

Or maybe they made a comment that you exaggerate, or labeled you as depressed or stressed when you know in your heart that is not the reason for your symptoms.

If you’ve been feeling like your doctor is dismissing you, or if you feel like they’re not taking your symptoms seriously, you may be experiencing something known as “medical gaslighting.”

Gaslighting is a type of abuse that makes the victim question their own sanity and doubt their own experiences and perception. If you’re feeling like your doctor is gaslighting you, you’re not alone.

This post will explain what medical gaslighting is, how to recognize it, and what steps you can take to deal with it. Medical gaslighting is unfortunately very common, especially among minorities and women.

I have experienced it numerous times during my life and I still struggle with the consequences today.

What is medical gaslighting?

According to Wikipedia: “Gaslighting is a colloquialism, loosely defined as making someone question their own reality.”

Recently on social media, a term called medical gaslighting has been getting more attention. Medical gaslighting can be defined as a situation in which doctors or other medical personnel wrongfully blame patients’ illnesses on psychological factors or deny they exist at all, for example telling those who have chronic systemic symptoms that what they are experiencing is not real.

I’m not in love with the term because it implies that the gaslighting is intentional, and I don’t feel that, at least in most cases, it is done intentionally. However, the psychological impact can be just as traumatic and have a long-lasting impact.

Doctors and other medical staff need more education on how damaging this can be to one’s mental health and ultimately physical health as they are discouraged from seeking care.

As a nurse, I have seen this labeling many times in my career and this adds to the impact of my experiences with medical gaslighting on a personal level. I have an intense fear of being labeled or judged.

Who does medical gaslighting effect?

According to the American Autoimmune Related Diseases Association (AARDA), the average time for diagnosis is 4.5 years, and typically has seen four doctors. During that time, this population often experiences medical gaslighting.

Medical gaslighting can affect anyone but there are some factors that increase a person’s risk of experiencing it. These include:

• Minorities
• Women
• History of depression, anxiety, or other mental illness
• History of substance abuse

Medical Gaslighting Examples

Now that we have defined medical gaslighting, let’s look at some real-life examples.

My (male) doctor when I was a teenager with severe pelvic pain and menstrual cramping told me “it doesn’t hurt that bad.” He made it clear that he found my “complaints” annoying. I was later diagnosed with ovarian cysts. I was not being dramatic but was viewed and labeled as such, I presume because I was a teenager and female.

My doctor when I told him I had hives, joint pain, and tummy troubles “Stop stressing and take this antidepressant.” He didn’t give me anything for my actual symptoms because he thought it was in my head. I returned after several weeks of suffering and he basically outright told me that my symptoms were psychological. I started to believe him. I was forced to deal with it on my own and it took me years to get a diagnosis and proper treatment. Living with these symptoms had a significant impact on my quality of life and I became so depressed that I contemplated suicide. You can read more about the mental toll of chronic urticaria HERE.

My midwife when I complained of a racing heart and feeling faint. “Your anxiety could harm the baby. You should take medication.” I told her that I was not worrying about anything. Every visit she wanted to talk about my “anxiety” that did not exist, at least, not any more than usual, and pushed antianxiety meds. After several fainting spells and a serious fall, I was finally diagnosed with arrhythmia.

If you are experiencing physical symptoms and you feel your doctor isn’t taking you seriously, you may be experiencing gaslighting.

The effects of medical gaslighting

These experiences and messaging stick with us and make it hard to seek medical attention when we need it.

For example, I had debilitating abdominal pain for 3 months before I sought treatment. I was afraid that there was “nothing wrong”, it was “in my head” or even worse than I would be labeled as a “drug seeker”.

When discussing my pain with my new doctor I downplayed it. Many in the chronic urticaria and mast cell activation community are allergic to NSAIDs and this sometimes flags providers that we may be drug seekers. I was afraid that she would not believe me about how severe the pain was and label me. I told her “it’s probably nothing, just gas or something” and she believed me. She didn’t take my symptoms seriously because I wasn’t honest with her. She told me to clean up my diet and let her know if it doesn’t improve.

I was not honest about how it was impacting my life because I was afraid that any testing would come back normal and I would be ashamed for speaking up. Or maybe I was just imagining that it was so severe? These are the messages that have stuck with me.

Fast forward another 3 months and I had a breakdown because the pain was so severe and debilitating. I couldn’t take it anymore and scheduled a virtual call with my provider for antidepressants because my quality of life was so poor. I finally opened up about what was really going on and she got my imaging done and found the problem within a week.

I am overcome with fear of being laughed at, labeled, and not believed every time I have a medical issue that needs to be addressed. I question if I am really just being “dramatic” or “whiny”. I can’t get that 6 months of my life back but had I sought treatment it could have been resolved quickly.

The point of that story is that the effects of the medical gaslighting I experienced in my past impacted my decision on seeking medical attention. I questioned what I was experiencing and the severity of it. I also have a fear of being judged for “complaining” about something that turns out to be nothing. Thankfully it was not something more serious. In many cases, it is something serious but we have been conditioned not to advocate for ourselves because of the trauma of medical gaslighting.

This is a common response in patients who have experienced medical gaslighting. Medical gaslighting can be dangerous as it gives the patient the message that they can’t trust their own perceptions or that they can’t trust medical professionals. This can lead to avoidance of medical care and cause serious harm or even death.

Potential consequences of medical gaslighting include:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Fear or mistrust of physicians and other medical personnel
• Questioning one’s perceptions and experiences of symptoms
• Hesitation to seek care
• Can result in worsening of medical conditions that have been wrongly labeled as psychosomatic

Steps to take if you’ve been a victim of medical gaslighting

Now that you recognize what medical gaslighting is, what it looks like, and the potential consequences, what can you do about it?

Acknowledge that what you experienced is not okay. Sometimes we have a tendency to view medical professionals as superior to us. They are not. We are all human and equals. I would never tell someone to go against medical advice, however, you have the right to a second, third, or fourth opinion. It took me 3 doctors to get my chronic urticaria diagnosis. It takes an average of 4-5 doctors for most autoimmune conditions to be diagnosed, despite autoimmune issues being among the most common of chronic diseases.

Speak up. This is really hard for a lot of people, myself included. If you feel you can’t speak with your doctor and they are gaslighting you, speak with the office manager, and consider leaving a review to warn others.

Seek out a good counselor or therapist to help process your feelings. Medical gaslighting is traumatic and can have long-lasting effects. Sometimes we need to process what we have experienced and talk it out to recognize the impact that it has on us. A good therapist can help you process what you have experienced without bias and help you come up with a plan moving forward.

Learn to trust yourself again. Pay attention to what your body is telling you.

How to prevent medical gaslighitng

• Monitor and document your symptoms.
• Take pictures if appropriate.
• Bring someone to your appointment with you
• Read reviews before selecting your physician if you have that luxury

In my interview with Dr. Marcus Maurer about chronic urticaria, I made a point to ask him about doctors who don’t take our symptoms seriously. You can read the transcript or watch it here.

Sadly, many of us can relate to medical gaslighting and its long-lasting impact. It can make you question what you are experiencing. It can make it hard to trust medical professionals. It can be challenging to seek care when you have experienced medical gaslighting which can lead to poor health outcomes. Knowing that this is something that can impact your health and addressing it can help.

Have you experienced this? Share in the comments.

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